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Lies…Lies…Lies…Guns and Roses…

14 May , 2011,
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Guns and Roses-A guilty pleasure

The thing is, I really want to dislike Guns and Roses. I want to dislike this record.  After Appetite for Destruction was released as their debut in 1987, Guns and Roses put out an ep called Lies…Lies…Lies, or more commonly known as G n R Lies.

And I have always wanted to hate this record for a number of reasons…

I wish I had the disc in front of me, but I think I traded it to Joe Mendez at Below Zero records when he was still in Merced.  I think the first half of the record is all live covers of old Aerosmith tunes.  Perhaps some others.  There was nothing special about those songs to me.  They didn’t entirely suck, but they were nothing spectacular.  The part that annoyed me, was that the acoustic second half of the disc was so damned entertaining to me.

Guns and Roses-acoustic music

I Used to Love Her was the simplest song I think I had ever heard.  It was G, C and D.  I thought it was pretty good, actually.  I mean WTF?!?  To me, the song sounded like Axl trying to write like Edgar Allen Poe.  It was kind of funny in a morbid sort of way.

It was interesting to hear You’re Crazy off of Appetite for Destruction played acoustically on this record.

As damned offensive as I find the tune One in a Million, I can’t help but kind of like the chord progression.  And, some of Axl’s statements are so asinine and ignorant that I find it hard to take him serious, anyway.  In so many ways, One in a Million is a terrible song.  I can’t help it, the song makes me laugh.  I actually kind of don’t hate it.

Guns and Roses-Patience

But, the award for the Guns and Roses cheesy, ’80s Power Ballad certainly goes to the song Patience.

The first time I heard Patience, my initial reaction was WTF?!?  What the hell is this sh*t?  And as I got further into the song, I knew I was doomed.  I liked it.

The chords are simple, the lyrics are bad, what more do you need?  Patience was the perfect pop song for the late 1980s.

Who doesn’t remember Yoda telling Luke Skywalker that he must learn patience if he were to bring balance to the Force.  Yeah, well, that’s great. Seems like it all worked out for Luke Skywalker.  I’ve been told that I need to wait patiently, and continue down my life’s path.  All I seek will come to me with patience.

Well how the hell do you like that?!?  That sounds like one of those cut-rate fortune cookies.  Not even one of the more expensive fortune cookies, that you get at the high-class Chinese restaurants, I get one of the cheap fortunes. Oh Axl, you are so sensitive and deep.

This song is terrible. This song is obnoxious and pretentious. Once again, I can’t help it. I like this song a lot. Guilty pleasure, you know. Great. Patience. I can do that. Don’t you hate it when Guns and Roses can offer some valuable wisdom?

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  • Miles

    In spring of 1984, Mike Moon and I wrote the lyrics to a song called “Homicidal Maniac”, which he and his college room-mate put to music later that year. The thing is, a few years later, G&R release “I Used to Love Her” on the Lies x 3 cd–same damn chords, same damn progression and melody as ours.

    I’m not suggesting that we do anything about it now, I’m just sayin’…